How to Prioritize Your Marriage as a Busy Working Mom

22 September 2025

Let’s be honest. Being a working mom feels like juggling flaming swords on a unicycle… while answering emails and packing lunchboxes. Between daycare drop-offs, career deadlines, and never-ending laundry, it’s ridiculously easy to put your marriage on the back burner.

But here’s the catch — your relationship with your partner is the backbone of your family. When that connection fades, everything else can start to feel off balance. So how the heck do you prioritize your marriage when there's already a million things pulling at your attention?

Let’s dive in — not with guilt, but with real, doable ways to keep that spark alive and make your marriage a priority again (even when your calendar says otherwise).

Why It's Easy to Lose Touch (And Why It Matters)

Before we talk about the “how,” let’s get one thing straight — if you feel like your marriage has slipped down your priority list, you’re not alone. In fact, it’s incredibly common.

Motherhood is demanding. Your focus naturally shifts to your kids, especially in the early years. Career responsibilities add another layer. Sometimes, your partner ends up becoming more of a roommate or co-parent than a romantic partner.

But here's the thing — a strong marriage doesn’t just benefit you; it benefits your kids too. Children thrive in homes where love, respect, and partnership are modeled daily. Prioritizing your relationship isn’t selfish — it’s one of the most loving things you can do for your family.

1. Shift Your Mindset: Small Moments Matter

Let’s ditch the idea that prioritizing your marriage means grand gestures or weekend getaways every month (because who really has time for that?). Instead, focus on the small, everyday moments.

- Sending a “thinking of you” text during lunch.
- Sharing a glass of wine after the kids go to bed.
- A quick hug or kiss before heading off to work.

These tiny moments of connection add up. Think of your relationship like a plant—it doesn’t need gallons of water once a week, it needs a little daily care to thrive.

Quick Tip:

Insert a 2-minute check-in ritual each day. Just ask, “How was your day?” and actually listen. It sounds basic, but it works.

2. Get Real About Your Schedule (and Work With It)

Let’s address the elephant in the room—time. Or rather, the lack of it.

Being a working mom means your calendar probably looks like a color-coded war zone. But here’s the trick: what gets scheduled, gets done. That includes love and connection.

Try This:

- Plan intentional date nights—even if they’re at home in pajamas.
- Block time for your spouse just like any other priority.

It might feel a little weird to “schedule love,” but structure breeds consistency. And consistency keeps relationships strong.

3. Communicate Like Teammates (Not Roommates)

Communication isn’t just about talking—it’s about connecting and being seen.

When life gets busy, couples start talking only about logistics: who’s grabbing the kids? What’s for dinner? Did you pay the electric bill?

Sounds familiar?

Switch gears. Make it a point to talk about your thoughts, your dreams, your worries. Be each other’s sounding board, not just co-managers of the household.

Tip:

Set aside tech-free time (yes, put the phones down!) and really tune into each other. Even 10 minutes a day helps.

4. Build a Support System (So You Can Come Up for Air)

One of the biggest struggles for working moms? Feeling like we have to do it all. Spoiler alert: we don’t.

Ask for help. Lean on family, hire a babysitter, trade off child care with other moms. Having support gives you breathing room—not just for yourself, but for your marriage too.

Think of it like this:

Every time you outsource a task or say “no” to something draining, you create space for something life-giving. Like a quiet dinner with your partner. Or an uninterrupted conversation. That stuff is golden.

5. Reignite Intimacy (Without the Pressure)

Let’s talk intimacy. Yup, the physical kind.

After running around all day, collapsing into bed is often the top priority—romance optional. But physical connection matters. It’s not just about the act; it’s about feeling close, loved, and seen.

That said, it’s okay if things look different after kids. What matters is keeping the door open for intimacy—whatever that looks like for you right now.

Real Talk:

- Cuddle without an agenda.
- Leave little love notes.
- Flirt like you used to.

Building emotional closeness often leads to physical closeness, naturally.

6. Set Boundaries with Work and Kids

It’s tempting to give every ounce of energy to your job or your children. But if there’s nothing left for your partner, burnout creeps in—not just personal burnout, but relationship burnout too.

Boundaries matter.

- Set work hours that protect family time.
- Don’t be afraid to say “no” to extra commitments when your relationship needs care.

Your partner should be your safe space, not just the last on the list after everyone else is taken care of.

7. Make Your Partner Feel Valued (And Ask for What You Need)

This one's powerful. We all want to feel appreciated. But during the hustle of parenting, gratitude can slip through the cracks.

Tell your partner thank you—for the small stuff, not just the big wins. And in return, be honest about what you need too.

- “Thanks for doing bedtime tonight—I'm seriously wiped.”
- “I’d love if we had more one-on-one time this week; I miss you.”

These little exchanges build mutual respect and emotional connection.

8. Laugh Together (Even If It’s Over Spilled Milk)

Laughter is underrated in relationships, especially once kids come into the picture. But sometimes, laughter is the glue that holds it all together.

Watch a funny show together. Share memes. Reminisce about silly memories. Don’t let adulting steal your playtime as a couple.

Even during chaos — especially during chaos — find the humor.

9. Revisit the Beginning — Remember Why You Fell in Love

In the flurry of diapers and deadlines, marriages can shift from passion to practicality. But looking back can reignite that beginning-of-the-relationship magic.

Pull out old photos. Revisit the restaurant where you had your first date. Remind yourselves of the journey you’ve walked together.

When you remember where you started, it makes the hard work of keeping the connection alive feel more worthwhile.

10. Marriage Counseling Isn’t a Dirty Word

If things feel off and you’re struggling to reconnect, counseling isn’t a sign of failure—it's a sign of investment.

Think of it like a tune-up for your marriage. Even one or two sessions can help you both navigate challenges better and rediscover healthy ways to communicate.

There’s no shame in asking for help. Marriage is hard work, and therapy is just another tool to keep things strong.

Final Thoughts: Love Is a Verb

At the end of the day, your marriage doesn’t thrive on autopilot. It needs attention, intention, and yes, love in action.

Being a working mom is a full-time job (on top of your full-time job). But prioritizing your relationship doesn’t have to be overwhelming. It’s about the little things. The consistent things.

You’re building a life together. And giving your marriage the attention it deserves is one of the best gifts you can give not only to your partner but to yourself — and your children.

So whether today it’s a 5-minute cuddle, a flirty text, or a quiet dinner after bedtime — it all counts. Start small. Start now.

Your marriage is worth it.