It takes a village

June 18, 2026 - 17:27

A growing body of research suggests that the old saying "it takes a village" is not just a sentimental idea but a practical strategy for reducing parental burnout. Assistant Professor Jin Yao Kwan recently shared findings that highlight how co-parenting, whether with a partner, family members, or close friends, significantly lowers overall stress for mothers and fathers.

The study indicates that when parents share responsibilities, from feeding and bedtime routines to decision-making and emotional support, the mental burden becomes more manageable. Kwan explained that solo parenting often leads to a constant state of hyper-vigilance, where one person feels solely responsible for every outcome. This can trigger chronic fatigue and anxiety. In contrast, co-parenting creates a buffer. Knowing that another trusted adult is handling a task allows the brain to truly rest, not just pause.

Kwan also noted that the quality of the co-parenting relationship matters more than the number of people involved. Clear communication and mutual respect are key. When parents feel judged or undermined by their co-parent, stress levels can actually rise. But when the partnership is supportive, it fosters resilience in both the adults and the children.

The research encourages a broader view of family support systems. Instead of striving for self-sufficiency, parents should feel empowered to build their own village, whether that includes grandparents, neighbors, or close friends. The takeaway is simple: sharing the load does not mean failing as a parent. It means being smart enough to know that no one should have to do it all alone.